THIS TRAIN’S FASTER THAN A SPEEDING BULLET

Brad Pitt is the zany, condemned  assassin named Ladybug,  in an action adventure called “Bullet Train,” because, well, he flits aboard this sleek and seething Kyoto-bound train like a explosive projectile.

The film plays like an anime cartoon on steroids, and it’s swift, swerving but simplistic. Like the “Fast and Furious” collection of racing and crashing cars, it’s non-stop collisions and confrontations.

A ”Murder on the Orient Express” this ain’t. And because of the collateral damage of this elitist and respected train, you’d think that the Japanese would be thumbs down on this unabashedly chaotic yet charismatic pursuit of good over evil, traversing green-screened land and cityscapes in a Nippon tale that is loaded with music (from “I’m Forever Blowing Bubbles” to Kyu Sakamoto’s “Sukiyaki” rendered in Japanese for incidental mood shifts).

Brad Pitt, center, as Ladybug in “Bullet Train;” Aaron Taylor-Johnson as Tangerine and Brian Tyree Henry as Lemon.

 It’s a trove of discovery, fueled with CGI artistry, that converts the real-life Shinkansen Japanese train (though not identified as Japan’s rail wonder) as it roars and soars into pulp fiction territory of sorts, with unspoken tributes to Quentin Tarantino and his style of no-goods  with plenty of kicks, blasts, blood and mayhem, in what would clearly be dubbed black comedy.

This  jaunt involves a desired briefcase, loaded with moolah, and it seems like everyone’s trying to grab it.

Ladybug gets hurled into this rampant exchange of chases, knifings, and fisticuffs, but he’s actually a substitute assassin to recover this stash. He’s fresh from anger management sessions, so he doesn’t board the train with a gun, and thus is clueless on what lies ahead on the tracks.

A British duo, cleverly named Tangerine (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) and Lemon (Brian Tyree Henry), are the hustlers with muscles and weapons. No, they don’t make lemonade, but since one of these assassins on the hunt – Lemon – is addicted to the kid-time “Thomas the Talking Engine”  train and book, you know you’re in fairytale land. Especially when he issues stickers of Thomas’ train gang.

However,  a train sticker has relevance in the unreeling tale: it decorates the handles of the coveted silver suitcase, a giveaway if you’re hunting for clues. Occasional pauses in the story involve Japanese kanji along with English subtitles, perhaps to remind the spectator of the Japanese roots of this tale, adapted from Kōtarō Isaka’s 2010 novel, though devoid of all the motion and commotion depicted here.

Like “Trainspotting, ”  odd people do mad things as the world swooshes by.  There are a few cameos, bringing needed giggles to film’s tension. Channing Tatum, for instance, is an off-center, playful commuter with a hilarious sexual overtone. Ryan Reynolds is aboard, too, mostly since  his earlier “Deadpool 2” film inked Pitt to do a cameo appearance, so this moment was payback of sorts. Both Tatum and Reynolds adopt the right look and appetite for their brief camera time.

Sandra Bullock

Then there’s Sandra Bullock, who comes late to the party; she’s not ever aboard the train but arrives in her own choo-choo of sorts, conveniently swooshing her new car amid the crashing and colliding train cars, projecting a cool, controlled  Maria Beetle,  the hitherto unidentified  handler of Pitt’s Ladybug dude. Doesn’t make much sense, but Beetle is the figure and focus of the Japanese author’s inspirational book, which was bravely entitled “Bullet Train.”

Masi Oki, whom islanders may recall as the medical examiner in the Alex O’Loughlin reboot of “Hawaii Five-O,” makes the best of his recurring conductor scenes,

The physicality and violence in the film are not easy to endure, because it’s hard to applaud glistening bloodshed, so perhaps this might have been a better vehicle as an animated film, where the gushing would be less severe or offensive.

 But there’s an underlying message of fate, and how Ladybug has to deal with it, lacking good karma. Suddenly, this humane sentiment somehow nullifies and excuses the punches and punctures of the dueling assassins.

The maddening and manic cadence is kinda like the gore and gritty scenes in the sci-hit earlier this year entitled “Everything Everywhere All at Once,” a volley of assaults and energy that put Michelle Yeoh and Jamie Lee Curtis in blockbuster heaven earlier this year. And no train, or replica, was ruined in that one, which was a surprise black comedy, too. …

Broadway grosses, week ending Aug. 7

So it was musical chairs on the Broadway front last week, with Hugh Jackman’s still the “Music Man” mogul, pulling in $2.825 million, shy of his usual $3 million sum, and “The Lion King” overtaking:”Hamilton,” with tallies of $2.222 million and “$2.219 million, respectively, in the nip-and-tuck contest for No. 2 and No. 3 in the ranking.

The figures, courtesy The Broadway League:

And that’s Show Biz. …

CROSSOVER LAUNCHES ‘NCIS’ SEASON

When CBS’ “NCIS” starts its 20th season in September, the Mothership show will include a crossover episode with “NCIS: Hawai‘i,” the franchise’s island-based newbie beginning its second season.

And despite the ongoing on-screen absence of executive director Mark Harmon, “NCIS” will host Hawaii leads Vanessa Lachey and Jason Antoon on the Sept. 19 episode. Both procedurals share Monday night slots, with “NCIS” at 8 p.m. preceding “Hawai’i‘’ at 9 p.m. on Monday night..

Vanessa Lachey

The original show’s “A Family Matter” opener begins where the 19th season ended, with Special Agent Alden Parker (Gary Cole) and ex-spouse Vivian (Terri Polo) on the lam. They gain assist when Jane Tennant (Lachey) intercedes with Ernie Malick (Antoon) and meet up with NCIS director Leon Vance (Rocky Carroll), in the midst of a global military exercise.

“Prisoners’ Dilemma” is the title of the island crossover episode, with Tennant’s team, with help from “NCIS” team members Nick Torress (Wilmer Valderrama) and Jessica Knight (Katrina Law), tracking the whereabouts of The Raven’s plans to invade the RIMPAC exercise. Other leads,Gary Cole, Brian Dietzen and Diona Reasonover, also appear….

Filming coincided with the actual RIMPAC dynamics here, so the episodes are in the can, awaiting the season launch. …

Shall we dance?

Greg Zane

Greg Zane, the choreographer, dancer, actor and director, is home again. Alas, not for doing a musical, like last summer’s exquisite “A Chorus Line” at Diamond Head Theatre, but to get back to the roots: basic dance classes.

He posted on Facebook, while still in New York, that he was headed home today to conduct dance classes @ #queenemmaballet, on Aug. 11, 14, 16, 18 and 21, “and looking forward to the ocean, my family and (gulp) dancing on-stage again after a 10-year absence.” He added: “Pray for me.” Welcome home, buddy ….

Looking for a mouse, and more

Wordsworth

“Wordsworth,” the new family musical about a poet mouse, is looking for a cast of players for the world premiere of the show based on the character mouse from author Frances Kakugawa’s books. The show, adapted for the stage by Jackie Pualani Johnson, premieres Nov. 7 at the theater at the University of Hawaii Hilo campus Performing Arts Center..

Tryouts for an English version of the show (an earlier play was done and taped in the Hawaiian language) will be held from 5:30 to 8 p.m. Aug. 23 and from 7 to 9:30 p.m. Aug. 24 at the theater on the Big Island.

Justina Mattos is director, Wendell Ing is musical director, and Kea Kapalua is choreographer.

Besides the titular mouse, available roles for Wordsworth’s ohana (mom, dad, three brothers, a sister), and friends  Emily, Eliot and Dylan, among others.

For details, contact director Mattos at (808) 932-7491 or jmattos@hawaii.edu

Nightlife, revisited

Shari Lynn

The Shari Lynn Trio performance, set for Aug. 26 at Medici’s at Manoa Marketplace, has been postponed till Sept. 30, due to conflicts with one of the musicians. Tickets purchased for the original date will be accepted for the updated timetable. ….

The John Kolivas-led Honolulu Jazz Quartet’s Aug. 5 show at Medici’s at Manoa Marketplace has been canceled, but a new slot has not yet been announced. …

And that’s Show Biz. …

END OF RAINBOW AT  HAWAII THEATRE

Randy Rainbow (his real name) is bringing his Pink Glasses Tour to the Hawaii Theatre, for a lone performance at 8 p.m. Dec. 2. Honolulu is the final stop of his tour of Mainland cities.

If you’re a YouTube follower of his incredibly creative and expressive parodies of political figures, you know he’s an artist extraordinaire. His parodies, particularly during the Donald Trump campaign and presidency, are mini-musical-moments of whimsy and wonderment, with Rainbow doing all elements of the process. He writes, produces, directs, costumes and clearly is a one-man trouper who knows how to fashion and mount hilarious and powerful slams. His targets include the likes of Joe Biden and a slew of GOP figures; I’ve shared his stuff on my website for years.

Randy Rainvbow

In his popular touring show, he can’t do multiple Rainbows in full-bloom costumes, so part of the presentation taps his library of parody gems.

Tickets range from $57.50 to $189.50, on sale at the Hawaii Theatre box office. Two tiers of VIP packages also are available for diehard fans; the $189.50 tier 1 includes premium seating, a meet-and-greet with Rainbow, early entry, and a Q&A session; the $131.50 tier 2 package includes premium seating, early entry, and an autographed copy of Rainbow’s book.

 Visit www.hawaiitheatre.com or call  (808) 528-0506. …


A gift pahu

Nani Dudoit

Let the drumroll begin! To support wife Nani Dudoit’s launch of her Halau Kaleilehuaikealoonalani, Ho’okena leader Horace Dudoit III gifted his wife-kumu with a spanky new pahu (drum) that certainly will become a valuable addition to her halau.

Horace asked his hula brother/pal Brad Cooper to create the instrument with specific requirements, and when the pahu was pau “it turned out so beautiful that I just couldn’t wait” to give Nani the surprise gift early. 

The pahu has a name, Kananinoheaokaleilehua, or Nohea for short., and it means “the lovely and handsome beauty of the lei lehua,” Horace said on a Facebook post. “It has references to all our boys and granddaughter names and the halau where Nani comes from.” …

Kumu Kahua revives ‘Las Vegas’

Kumu Kahua will revive Edward Sakamoto’s “Aloha Las Vegas” comedy beginning at 8 p.m. Aug. 25 at its downtown theater.

The play focuses on a retired widower eager to sell his Liliha home and relocate to Las Vegas, where he might live amid more affordable ease. To go or stay, that is the question.

Performances are at 8 p.m. Thursdays through Saturdays, and 2 p.m. Sundays, through Sept. 24.

Tickets: $5 to $25, at https://www.eventbrite.com/e/aloha-las-vegas-tickets-338500192187

Around town

After the Point, a flashback of sorts, is slated at 7 p.m. Aug. 20, at the Convention Center. The evening sounds like the comeback disco and the ‘70s and ‘80s bands, since Aura and Greenwood are uniting to bring back the dreamy dancing memories of yesteryear, whether it’s slow dancing or jiving and bouncing on the dance floor. If you frequented The Point After, at the Hawaiian Regent  or Rumours at the Ala Moana Hotel, you know what’s in store. For tickets, visit www.hawaiistars.com

And that’s Show Biz. …

HARMONY ON THE SYMPHONY AGENDA

With the pandemic in its rear view mirror, the Hawaii Symphony Orchestra is looking for harmony and stability in a new four-year contract with the orchestra’s 84 musicians.

The HSO board has ratified the  pact, also overwhelmingly approved by the orchestra’s union, Musicians’ Assn. of Hawaii, Local 677, which assures 18 weeks of performances for the first two years, 19 weeks in the third year, and 21 weeks in the final year. The agreements cover the fiscal years from 2022 through 2026, somewhat rare in the still uncertain pandemic cloud that has stalled growth and security for many orchestras.

Dave Moss

“The heart of the symphony is our musicians and the signing of this multiple-year agreement ensures that they will have opportunities for growth as we continue our mission-driven work for the community,” said Dave Moss, president & CEO of HSO. “In a large way, it ends years of stops and starts for the Hawai‘i Symphony Orchestra throughout the past decade and puts HSO in a place of unprecedented stability, even after we’ve navigated the effects of the pandemic.”

James F. Moffitt

“The four-year agreement is unusual among orchestras at this time. For Hawai‘i, it will allow the HSO management time to recover from the detrimental effects of the pandemic and it gives the musicians job security and growth to look forward to,” said James F. Moffitt, president of the Musicians’ Association of Hawaii, Local 677. “This will also strengthen the organization by giving confidence to patrons, donors and sponsors, encouraging them to continue to contribute generously as they anticipate the expanded programming and financial stability of the HSO.”

“The harmony between musicians, board, administration and community serves as the catalyst behind the credibility and trust that has been established over the past three years, both financially and artistically,” said Paul Kosasa, chairman  of the HSO board of directors..

The  contractual certifications will assure stability for the orchestra, when it launches the upcoming season, beginning Oct. 8, and enables HSO to continue the Halekulani Masterwork Concerts Series, the HapaSymphony Series, Starlight Series and additional special performances ….

‘Doogie’ boyfriends

Alex Aiono

Alex Aiono will return in season two of Disney+’s “Doogie Kamealoha, M.D.,” already in production here. Aiono has been portraying Walter Taumata, the surfer boyfriend of Lahela, the titular character played by Peyton Elizabeth Lee, who is the teen doctor when she’s not in high school. His relationship with Lahela, however, has not been defined since the series this year also cast Milo Manheim in a new recurring role and a likely boyfriend of Lahela.

Aiona also has  been a regular in “Pretty Little Liars: Original Sin,” the HBO Max streamer, where he appears as Shawn. His Hawaiian/Polynesian looks are from his Samoan-Maori father and he calls Phoenix, AZ his home. …

Casting couch

Keanu Reeves

Keanu Reeves, a Hawaii native of “The Matrix” and “John Wicks” franchises, will star in his first TV mainstreamer on Hulu,  “Devil in the White City,” based on Erik Larson’s book. The movie explores the life of Daniel Burnham, a visionary architect, who left his mark on the 1893 Chicago World’s Fair, supposed the part Reeves will play, opposite a yet-to-be-cast  Dr. H.H. Holmes, considered to be America’s first modern serial killer (200 victims) and the dude behind the “Murder Castle” built in the shadow of the World’s Fair. The film boasts two celeb exec producers, Martin Scorsese and Leonardo DiCaprio

Lady Gaga will add wattage to Joaquin Phoenix’s “Joker 2,” officially to be called “Joker: Folie a Deux,” when she plays Harley Quinn, a tongue-in-cheek handle for sure. In an early posting in June, Variety said the sequel would be a musical, though that distinction has not be mentioned in her casting announcement, but it had a musical teaser, tapping “Cheek to Cheek,” a song legitimizing her  career as a chanteuse-partner of Tony Bennett rather than an oddly-dressed pop-rocker. ..

Look for James Franco to play Fidel Castro in “Alina of Cuba,” an indie flick about Alina Fernandez, daughter  of the Cuban revolution. It’s a true story of her exile from Cuba and also features Natalia Revuetta as the Cuban socialite whose affair with Castro resulted in the birth of Alina. …

Zippy’s Senior Card expiring

If you possess a Senior Card from Zippy’s restaurants in Hawaii, you have until Sunday (Aug. 7) to utilize the card. The program will conclude effective Aug. 8.

A new Zipster program will replace the card, which has been a boon for the elderly with its 10 per cent discount for dine-in or take-out patronage. …

And that’s Show Biz. …

READERS THEATRE MOVING TO TAG

Windward Readers Theatre, a fixture at Pohai Nani retirement residence in Kaneohe for many years, will launch its 9th Readers Theatre season Aug. 8 at a new location, the Brad Powell Theatre at TAG, The Actors Group at the  Dole Cannery complex in Iwilei.

WRT, championed by the remarkably tireless director  Vanita Rae Smith and a booster of the Readers Theatre format, has played to intimate audiences for years.  Smith scheduled Readers Theatre for 12 years, which were Sunday afternoon sessions at the Army Community Theatre’s Richardson Theatre at Ft. Shafter, for 12 seasons, where Smith was artistic director of 24 years of musical theater successes under the auspices of the U.S. Army.

Vanita Rae Snith

The Readers format meant that elite and discriminating viewers would huddle on seats on the mainstage, where some of Hawaii’s legendary names would rely on the words of playwrights of works to bring drama to life, with listeners bringing their imagination to the plate.

Now the format will still be targeting readers and listeners alike, in the modest but effective TAG space. These theatrical Dark Night selections  — meaning attractions staged during the usual non-show evenings — will be embraced as part of TAG’s new season, with tickets at a modest $20 price.

Dwight Martin

The premier Readers Theatre vehicle at TAG will be staged at 7:30 p.m. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday – Aug. 8, 9 and 10 – with Dwight Martin, former Manoa Valley Theatre producing director, embracing John Barrymore, in William Luce’s “Barrymore” directed by Smith. The piece is filled with tension and surprises, surrounding the film and stage star, in the grips of advanced alcoholism, prepping for a production of “Richard III,” and reflecting on his multifaceted life, loves and legendary statue, a leading man on the brink of his last hurrahs.

“The last time we did a Readers Theatre at Pohai Nani was in March of 2020, and the auditorium there has been shut down since,” said Smith of the pandemic that closed nearly everything. “We didn’t charge an admission at Pohai Nani, and had a plate for donations, which went to them to cover expenses (of producing fees).

“Our new home at TAG will broaden the horizon of Readers Theatre, which are oral interpretations that fits the spirit at our new location,” said Smith, who has assembled  a slate of Readers Theatres scripts which amount to a legitimate “season.”

Also in the Readers Theatre agenda:

* Jo Pruden, portraying Lillian Hellman in  William Luce’s “Lillian,” at 7:30 p.m. Sept. 26, 27 and 28. Replaces an earlier-announced Bronte work. Directed by Smith.

* Alan Shepherd’s “Mary and Joe,” at 7:30 p.m. Oct. 4, 5, 10, 11, 12. Featuring Shepherd, Amy K. Sullivan, Christine Umipeg and others. Directed by Shepherd.

* Agatha Christie’s “Murder, Margaret, and Me,” at 7:30 p.m. Jan. 23, 24 and 25. Featuring Jo Pruden, Shari Lynn and Eden Lee Murray. Directed by Smith.

*  “Sea Marks,” based on a memoir of Gardner McKay, at 7:30 p.m. May 29, 30 and 31, 2023. Featuring Annie Rennick and Peter Clark. Directed by Smith. …  

Dark Night Readers Theatre shows require an additional admission, apart from the fees of TAG’s weekend shows.

TAG’s 2022-23 season launches with David Lindsey-Abaire’s “Good People,” directed by Peggy Anne Sigmund,  opening  at 7:30 p.m. Friday (Aug. 5), with performances Thursdays through Sundays through Aug, 21 (2 p.m. curtain on Sundays). Tickets are $35 adults, $25 seniors and $20 students and military. Visit www.tagtickets@hawaii.rr.com or call (808( 722-6941. TAG requires viewers to don facemasks at all of its shows. …

Broadway grosses, for week ending July 31

The leaders still lead, in the roster of box office champs, but the dollars are fewer at least for now.

“The Music Man” still is No. 1, grossing $2.940 million, but not over the top of $3 million for much of its run to date. So Hugh Jackman is still the Money Man, too.

“Hamilton” again is No. 2, demonstrating it’s still a hottie in the room where it happens, pulling in $2.246 million.

“The Lion King” still has its roar, at No.3 and $2.166 million.

The list is courtesy the Broadway League. And note that the charts now show the rundown by grosses, not alphabetically. …

And that’s Show Biz. …